Showing posts with label emotional intelligence. Show all posts
Showing posts with label emotional intelligence. Show all posts

Monday, 13 May 2013

Attitude control and effective leadership

Flying, attitude control and crashes


Early efforts at fixed-wing aircraft design succeeded in generating sufficient lift to get the aircraft off the ground, but once aloft, the aircraft proved uncontrollable, often with disastrous results. The development of effective flight controls is what allowed stable flight. This is known as attitude control.

It occurred to me that leadership is a lot like flying a plane - taking off is easy but without proper attitude control the leadership provides unstable, also with disastrous results.

Better control; better flight; better leadership


In attitude trumphs skill I wrote about how leadership is primarily judged on attitudes seen so what would constitute ‘attitude control’ for leadership?

Here’s 8 key behaviours (with thanks to Charlie Pellerin),  that show the right attitude in leadership, by example– which do you live the best / find the hardest?

1.       Clarifying roles, accountability and authority for team members

2.       My gratitude helps others feel appreciated

3.       I work with others to find shared goals and interests

4.       I evaluate and appropriately include others

5.       I clarify agreements, keeping them and renegotiating in advance before they are broken

6.       I call out unpleasant realities and present realistic solutions

7.       I am 100% committed to the outcome I’m seeking

8.       I recognise and shift drama  in myself and others towards resolution

9.       My behaviour and language confirm what results I am accountable to produce

Tuesday, 23 October 2012

The play-date is over - redeeming 'best enemies'



So I've 1-2 best enemies in my life (no, no names!)

They're pretty much self-made. They achieved it through a concerted effort to run over other people (sometimes me, mostly others).

Such people suffer from a complete lack of emotional intelligence.

A few exhibits from the Night Gallery (with a nod to the great Rod Serling):

Picture a person who:
  • promised to help another, while disparaging them behind their back; or
  • repeatedly practices 'blunt is the new black'; or
  • believes its ok to actively exclude others. 
Do you know such people? I know all three. Phew they make it tough to include them!

They miss out on a lot.

I have to wonder what we miss out on, by keeping them as 'best enemies'

I'm asking myself some tough questions:
  • How has keeping them as a 'best enemy' improved my life?
  • What do they know that could make others lives better?
  • Does this take energy keeping them at a distance?
  • What role have I played in this broken relationship?
  • Do I want more of this?
One thing's clear - 'best enemies' hasn't driven anything constructive.

Maybe the phrase 'keep your friends close and your enemies closer' has a different interpretation.

How do you handle your best enemies?